Two Dwarfs (Rated ‘PG-13′)

Two dwarfs decide to treat themselves to a vacation in Las Vegas. At the hotel bar, they’re dazzled by two women, and wind up taking them to their separate rooms. The first dwarf is disappointed, however, as he’s unable to reach a certain physical state that would enable him to join with his date. His [...] Read more »

A Guy’s Sex Life “Featuring the Monkey!” (‘PG-13′)

It seems that when the Lord was making the world, he called man over and bestowed upon him twenty years of normal sex life. Man was horrified. “Only twenty years of normal sex life?” but the Lord was very adamant that was all man could have. Then the Lord called the monkey and gave him [...] Read more »

The Big Boyfriend (Rated ‘R’)

A man walks into a bar and notices a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. he goes to her and says, “You know, I would LOVE to kiss your breasts!” The embarrassed woman sais, “My boyfriend is the bouncer here, and if you don’t leave me alone I will go get him!” “Ok, ok, I [...] Read more »

Don’t Speak

Steve is shopping for a new motorcycle. He finally finds one for a great price, but it’s missing a seal, so whenever it rains he has to smear vaseline over the spot where the seal should be. Anyway, his girlfriend is having him over for dinner to meet her parents. He drives his new bike [...] Read more »

Welcome to the Church (Props to Tom K.)

Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle-aged couple and a young newlywed couple wanted to join a church. The pastor said, “We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks.” The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks. The pastor went to the elderly [...] Read more »

Cheaper Than A Doctor

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him, “My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor.” “Listen, you don’t have to spend that kind of money,” Mike replies. “There’s a diagnostic computer at the drugstore at the corner. Just give it a urine sample and [...] Read more »

Built Like a Baby

A man and a woman had been dating for about a year, and their relationship was getting serious. The man proposed marriage, and she accepted. However, she told him that she wanted him to know that her chest was just like a baby’s. He said that he loved her and that her measurements didn’t matter [...] Read more »

Sneezing Quivers

A man and a woman are sitting beside each other in the first class section of the plane. The woman sneezes, takes a tissue, gently wipes her nose and shudders quite violently in her seat. The man isn’t sure why she is shuddering and goes back to reading. A few minutes pass. The woman sneezes [...] Read more »