Three Brilliant Office Jokes

A Day Off Sick

An employee who had a terrible history for taking time off phoned in again one Monday morning:
“I’m sorry, but I’ll not be able to come in today as I’m too sick.”

On hearing this his exasperated boss could barely conceal his anger and retorted in a rage:
“well, just how sick are you?”

“Well” the employee sighed, “I’m in bed with my sister!”

The New Secretary

Two guys were discussing the new secretary at their office. John to George: “Man, I dated her last Tuesday and we had wonderful sex. She’s a lot better in bed than my wife!”

Two days later. George to John: “Well, I dated her too and we had sex as well, but I still think your wife is better in bed!”

A Drop in Salary
A man came home from work one day to find his wife sitting on the front porch with her bags packed. He asked her where she was going and she replied “I’m going to Las Vegas.”

He questioned her as to why she was going and she told him “I just found out that I can make $400.00 a night doing what I give you for free”.

He pondered that then went into the house and packed his bags and returned to the porch and with his wife. She said “And just where do you think you’re going?”

“I’m going too!!” he replied.

“Why?” She asked.

“I want to see how you are going to live on $800.00 a year”!

Let Monkey Know What You Think...